Thursday, March 11, 2010

fear. its silly.

As a youngster, I grew up an only had its advantages:

-Sharing didn't exist at my house. It was all mine.
-Attention was mine too.
-Did I mention not having to share?

But, in all seriousness....It was tough. Lots of quiet...lots of play on my own....lots of one-on-one with my parents (which I truly loved) but a someone to play with was always a lingering desire.

I had a fear growing up. Once in my teens, I thought "What if I never get to be an aunt?" I mean, if I marry another only child....our children will have no cousins. I know that is far-thinking for a pre-teen....but it worried me.

Time went on...after meeting Joel and falling in love, I got introduced to his 3 brothers. Immediately immersed in the funny stories, ER visits, broken bone sagas, etc. I LOVED it! I loved every moment of hearing the stories about Matt and his crazy pranks on Ryan and Joel....I loved watching my husband laugh as they remembered. I also noticed how happy Joel's parents were as they reminisced over it all. Memories they had worked hard to make....never forgotten.

Joel and I married and I was excited to have a nephew...he was ADORABLE (still is) - Elijah! Oh Elijah was the baby Joel and I 'pretended' was ours....we loved taking him out for a little jaunt with Uncle Joel and soon to be Aunt Jess....I remember a sigh of relief to the fear I had before....I was an AUNT!!

Along came Aidan...the fiery 2nd born with dimples and a smile that would make girls want to throw him their room keys and bras....this guy is going to be HOT...all I gotta say!

Next was the exciting news...during a tough time in the family...that a new nephew/niece would be along....a month after that news...was OUR news of little Jude-to-be in my tummy tum tum. I was a part of it now. Mommyhood.

Fast forward to the present and ANOTHER great nephew has been added - along with a beautiful new son of my own. Fears....they are not worth the time. I thank God for the blessing of these my life as they teach me about God's innocence...and in my children's lives as they teach one another about family.

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